If you ask women, lying in the hospital, whom they want — a boy or a girl, most probably will answer: of course, my daughter! Son want to please her husband, but the dream of giving birth to my daughter. 20 years from now these same women often begin to complain that naughty daughter, did not meet their expectations don’t understand the loved one — your mom… And adult daughters, meanwhile dreaming of the birth of a child — of course, girls.
In fact, most women believe that the younger daughter will become a mainstay in my life, carer, close friend. What is the reason for this belief? The fact that women subconsciously equate his daughter with him. Often the mother is even difficult to understand where the boundary between her and her daughter. Usually it is quite natural, while the little girl knotted bows on silky curls and dress up in beautiful dresses like a doll (no wonder our grandmothers said, “the First child is the last doll”). At this age my daughter is in fact very close with his mother. The difficulties begin when the child is approaching school age. In addition to the daughter of his second, a woman tries in her upbringing to compensate for all the shortcomings of their life. Continue reading
Education of the individual in Japan is very different from traditional education in Russia. Those rude phrases, which are easy to hear on our playgrounds: “you’re bad”, “now I will punish you” it is impossible to imagine there. Even if the little Japanese boy would fight with my mother or felt-tip pen to draw on the white door of the store are no strict punishments and reprimands will not follow. Up to 5-6 years old child here everything is allowed. Such liberal tradition of educating absolutely not fit into our ideas about how to raise children.
The basis of education in Japanese society is a tolerant and friendly attitude to a young child. Such permissiveness in childhood, adult Japanese citizens are law-abiding and ability to live by the interests of the team and company.
What Russians consider minor offences: beer behind the wheel, a conflict with a fight on holiday, journey on forbidding signal of a traffic light, — it is impossible for Japanese. To live is required by the rules. Break the rules (“losing face”). That in Japan, children are taught from early childhood, is the basis of education.
Amazing result? Actually, the education of the individual in Japanese society is constructed so that this result is a natural Continue reading
There are several relatively Autonomous psychological mechanisms through which parents influence their children. In the first place. the reinforcements. encouraging behavior that adults think is right ,and punishing the violation of established rules ,parents inculcate in the mind of the child a certain system of norms ,compliance with which gradually becomes for the child a habit and an internal need. Secondly. identification. the child imitates the parents ,guided by their example ,is trying to become like them. Thirdly ,understanding. knowing the inner world of the child and sensitively responding to its challenges ,parents thereby shape his consciousness and communicative quality.
Family socialization is not confined to direct “paired” to the interaction of the child with the parents. Thus, the effect of identification can be neutralized by a counter-role complementarity. for example, in a family where both parents can very well run a household, the child may not develop these abilities. as. although before his eyes a fine specimen. the family does not need the manifestation of these qualities; on the contrary. in the family. where the mother of echosystem, this role may take on the eldest daughter. No less important is the psychological mechanism of resistance. the young Continue reading